Sold On Mars

  No one actually knows who first discovered Mars.  It is known that Tycho Brahe, a Danish astronomer, made accurate calculations of the position of Mars as early as 1576; but it’s obvious this was just polishing a well accustomed knowledge of the whereabouts of the planet. I happen to notice that we Earthlings just can’t seem to get enough of bringing this Martian idea into a welcoming embrace. Which by the way, who decided we aren’t Earthian’s and if anyone would hail from there they’d not be Marlings?

  Just to give a nod to the whole Mar’s namesake, Ares was the Greek god of war, then got a Roman facelift into THEIR God of war, Mars; along with tossing in some extra duty as guardian of Agriculture.  But that’s not the Mar’s I am speaking of; nor am I talking about the fantastical Bruno Mars, or David Bowies album Living on Mars, or one of my all time favorite Candy bars.

  I will only give a passing nod to the really fun paranoia born over being invaded by Martians depicted in H.G Wells book War of the Worlds, written in 1898, talk about imagination! That fascination was bombastic and renewed by Orson Welles radio broadcast in 1938 that held the listening public hostage by hysteria for hours until government officials could sort it all out and explain to the panicking citizens that it was just a story.  Later on Hollywood took a crack at the theme in its 1953 Version with the then popular Gene Barry; later in 2005 another movie adaptation starring Tom Cruise re-enacted a now timeless tale of aliens from our own beloved solar system coming down here and raising a ruckus.

Cool-and-awesome. 

  But, yet the newest version on the topic of the Red Planet is, by far, a great invention of its own; it’s called Mars One.  It’s gathered more attention on the Internet than say the mainstream US news media because, well, it’s a clever marketing ploy.  Not an all-together-outright-snake selling venture, but a media extravaganza nonetheless; and like all good canards, there is adequate possibility woven into shroud of deception to give credence to its legitimacy.

   Mars One Project is connected to the non-profit Mars One foundation, and the for-profit company Interplanetary Media Group who proposes to generate the funding to train and launch selected-ordinary-people to go to Mars, (amongst other cost to be sure).  Oh yes, wrapped in this cleverly disguised gimmick is a goal, a timeline, and a very detailed dream of how it could happen.  All captured 24/7 and 365 days a year by technology.  Think of reality TV but all of the time; or better still, a new twist on the movie The Truman Show.  Except with the Mars One Project the participants know they’re part of the drama; even if most believe that the project is in earnest and intentionally really-really-really going to launch their space craft to Mars in about ten years.

  If you want to delve into all of that I’m only too happy to provide you with the web link; mars-one.com, (btw look to the right on the homepage and you’ll see a link to the introduction film; it’s really cool and persuasive as all get out.)  An-duh you can spend, well, hours viewing the biographies of the present applicants vying for a seat on the trip.  Hey, maybe you’d even be convinced to apply? It only cost $5 and a ton of your not-so-precious time making a convincing video that should be intended to convince an unknown panel (yet to be named) that you’d be an entertaining Mars-destine-eager-beaver.

  But my amusement albeit, near chagrin, was not affixed to just that venture but rather the opportunities such an exploit offered. I mean after all who hasn’t heard of selling the Brooklyn Bridge or swamp land in Florida?  So the real thrill for me was to take it a step further; and be, well, socially helpful in the process.  How about we take this spacecraft to Mars idea and send criminals? A modern Botany Bay endeavor as it were.  If you’re unfamiliar with that, On April 1770 Botany Bay was the site of James Cook’s first landing of HMS Endeavour onto the continent of Australia. In short order the British established a penal colony and out of these plans came the first European habitation of Australia at Sydney Cove.

  A footnote to history should be a mentioned here and that is to commiserate with the loss by the Tharawal and Eora Aboriginal peoples and their associated clans that had been living there and using the bay as an important source of food and place for trade.  But hey, this time there’s no one to displace so we can all feel rather jolly good about ourselves for emptying the prisons and giving what some would call reprobates a hearty second chance at making something of themselves; 

preferable out of range of our notice. So then, ship the reticent offenders off and be finished with that kind of annoyance (and cost of incarceration) and we’ll have created a win-win situation…if everything goes well on the flight that is.

Sometimes I can come up with some really amazing stuff.