Final Exams

Final Exams

  Well we’re here; the end of May, and that means the awesome task of facing( or having had faced) final exams all across this great country.  The Finals, end of the year effort to justify all those months of day dreaming; about what? Doesn’t really matter; the point being, it wasn’t about the topic being presented.  The choices at this particular threshold have historically been rather clear; do the work, prepare in advance, and review in the final hours.  Or, conversely as well as most likely, blow off the work until the week before finals; realize it’s hopeless to try and cram all that knowledge into a few nights effort; order pizza and hope divine intervention is not a myth, where Oma and Opa up in heaven are pulling stings to make the inheritance money they gave you to go to college not be a big waste of their frugal life savings.

  I came across some very funny examples of witty students who faced down the inevitable hammer of failure.  Now really, don’t we really want fellow citizens who can think on their feet? I know in a bus crash I sure do.

Q: In Which Battle did Napoleon die?

A: his last battle

Q: Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

A: at the bottom of the page

Q: River Ravi flows in which state?

A: liquid

Q: What is the main reason for divorce?

A: marriage

Q: What is the main reason for failure?

A: exams

  You get the idea.  My favorite was this. 

If I were a professor, I’d pass this fellow on pure brass cajones.

  By the way, Richard Benson the author of the book F in Exams, The very best totally wrong test Answers, is an American printer, teacher, and photographer.  He actually taught at Yale University until 2011. He put together a collection of brilliance-under-duress test taking and offered it up as a book.  It continues to be a smashing success.

Q: What did Mahatma Gandhi and Genghis Khan have in common?

A: Unusual names.