Early Days

Remember those early days playing on the jungle gym?

I still cringe today thinking about my angst over the possibilities of those 'could have's' with my son.

   "Dad! Dad! Look at me!" He'd shout hanging upside down from eight feet up.

   "Oh my God!" my soul would screech without a sound uttered.

   "That's nice honey," my lips would say, as my heart played wipeout in my chest.

   "Be care-ful" I'd creak, trying to disguise my alarm; sounding cheerful. The idea was to not  scare him; or distract him in any way with my terror, fulfilling a parents worst nightmare.

  " I will" he chirped back, then pull himself back up; my heart coming down from my throat in unison with his efforts.

Small drops of perspiration surfaced on my forehead and upper lip, I turned my head feinting interest in other activities in the park, but only in desire for him to not see me trembling,

   "God help me!" I bit my lip while looking back, wearing a pasted smile while waving enthusiastically at his next death defying antic; showing him I was watching, dreading he'd loose focus for want of getting my attention.

  " I see Hon-ey!" ( Oh lord, oh lord, oh lord)  "Uh huh, ver-ry neat!" ( Confidence, show confidence in him boy-o)

   "If I ever meet the man who invented that contraption I swear I will pummel him!" I'd whisper with shallow breath, between clenched teeth of my frozen smile.

Then I would recall…..

My parents….

Voicing the very same words.  So life is a cruel, just, circle.  We are given ample opportunity to suffer for our children's sake as they develop.  It is the nature of parents.  Yet our darlings display the values we hoped they would embrace; and in doing so, we can celebrate a job well done.  Then, if luck is with you, they’ll have similar heart-stopping events with their own kids and you’ll be around to hear

“You won’t believe what YOUR Grandkid did today”

In my head I’ll be saying, “I hope he took ten years off your life.”

Revenge is dish best served cold.