A Friend In Deed

Yesterday, I was talking with a friend, and they mentioned the circulation of the forwarding of jokes...that the message captured the 'nature' of why some people engage in this practice.  Then this morning I receive the very topic he spoke of from another associate, and I was compelled to respond.  I share these with you with the desire to know your thoughts...please read and respond.  Let me know you better.

Subject: FW: Friends

 Sometimes, we wonder why friends keep forwarding to us jokes without writing a word, maybe this could explain:

 When you are very busy, but still want to keep in touch, guess what you do?  -- you forward jokes.

 When you have nothing to say, but still want to keep contact; you forward  jokes.

 When you have something to say, but don't know what, and don't know how; you forward jokes.

 To let you know that: you are still remembered, you are still important, guess what you get?  A forwarded joke.

 So my friend, next time if you get a joke, don't think that I have sent you just a joke, but that I have thought of you today and wanted to send you a smile.

Very insightful, it prompted me to respond with. 

  As with all our tools for expressing our feelings, the key ingredient that makes impact is our sincerity. 

  For what is the value of an empty compliment?  Or the repetitive "I love you" followed by indifferent behavior? I believe we've all experienced tuning out those droning as inconsequential, for we know,the words are uttered without conviction towards their intent; as in called to perform, to feel thus.  Saying 'I care' is just lips service without action. 

  As with all living things, relationships need tending.  Like growing plants, water alone does not sustain the process of growth.  Jokes are the water of relationships, this I concede. But without the fertile soil of personal information that has affect, that changes our intimates, those very events that transforms each of us from who we were into who we are now, then we allow the relationship to 'exist' but to drift...into unattended weeds of our past comprehension.

            I embrace where any action of "I care" are attempts to nurture those connections that sustain us in our affections.  Yet I perceive that attention to what is actually  important, is more the challenge.  To recognize the preciousness of those hearts dear to us allows our ambition to rest for just a moment.  Perhaps take the time to express our appreciation for their dedication to us?  What matter if a report is late? For the sake of reaching out an expression of our true gratitude?

   We live as if we have forever, in the midst of reminders that life is fleeting.  I'd rather take the opportunity NOW to invest my preciousness time as I feel, and show I care; then for thousands of dollars spent on flowers at a funeral.

   "You're important to me" is a simple thing. Not delude ourselves that spectating in our lives is the same thing as a sporting event.  Where children distracted in front of a TV is not being with them; nor is sending jokes the same as being interested in the changes facing our friends...or sharing ours with them. 

Too busy? 

That's the easy excuse, but it is our choice to invest our hearts in what matters.  Are we distracted with the cares of our world?  Certainly sustaining our living is important, but to the exclusion of all else?  Do we work to live? Or live to work?  Just maybe our friendships are wake up calls to those distractions that are consuming us.  To whisper, "Your heart matters more than accumulating things" Security is a myth, for all things are subject to change no matter how hard we resist its effect. 

The comforts in any of our lives are the souls who tend and are called to witness our being present; who care for us.  That is what is important.  The rest is just noise and illusions of permanence.

             We are sustained by those who love us.  They feed our self-worth; they embrace us for who we are.  Not the accomplishments of our worldly pursuits; those accolades are fleeting.  The hearth is where we are warmed.  Choose to tend the source of your energy.  Not those activities that drain from you your joy.  We should resist the temptation to treat our love casually, to take it for granted.  It is the river of our very existence. Just as quick to forward a joke, are the opportunities to take actions that demonstrate a creative ability to find solutions that inhibit our ability to live a full life.  There is abundance, and it starts with acknowledging the very light of us all.....I ....love....you.