Resolved to publish; this year by-gummy. I revisit my folders consisting of decades of
collected writing; they reside in no particular order. No, that’s not entirely true; there remains
evidence of half-hearted efforts to catalogue and categorize being taken up
from time to time. It is closer to a Swiss
cheese visage compilation. Many threads defy clarity.
Get organized, identify what am I going to tackle? Collect
some into Chapbooks of poetry?
Finish an anthology of short stories?
Perhaps churn that anthology of loosely fitting tales into a
Prose Chapbook?
Suddenly I forget what prose means? Are there, in fact, prose
chapbooks even?
A moment searching Google
dumps multitudinous pages of advice and links to publishers.
I am intimidated.
I am frightened by the demands of catering to the business
of publishing.
The options are buzzing about my awareness like angry
hornets disturbed from their nest.
Order
The pieces do not have a theme; some barely possess sense.
I’m reminded of an antiquated phrase about herding cats; a
kind metaphor, because cats at least pause on occasion to groom; my work mimics
closer to hornets; to ignore one is to be stung by shame for neglecting any of one’s
other darlings.
Breathe, you’ve been here before.
I have this snippet of recall of Oscar being brought to the
doggie day care center; Tail Wagger’s. A
chorus of barking rushes us as the car door opens. Oscar stirs with impatient frenzy as I work
to unstrap him from his doggie carrier. I hook his leash and place him on the
ground. He pulls with the might of a
farm oxen; getting to the counter is a two arm grabbed struggle; this from a
ten pound dog. The papers are signed,
the pickup time noted, transferred care for a short trip to the pack; we linger
to watch.
The pandemonium is elevated in earnest by the surge of
breeds to the door.
Ricocheting tails; poking snouts, all vying to get familiar.
I think of that moment with comparative dread; I cringe to
consider a liken ultimate happy place
With noses up my rear
Butts in my face to kiss
What was it I really wanted after all?
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